A new chapter
Well it’s finally happening. There is no ignoring it anymore. My youngest daughter is about to spread her wings and leave the nest. When she finished school in May last year, I was secretly pleased that studying in Australia meant she would stay with me for another 8 months I sympathized with my friends whose children were leaving in September. I provided a shoulder to cry on and even shed some tears with them. All the while happy on the inside that I had a bit longer with my little girl.
Well not any more, in less than 5 weeks she will be gone. To make it even worse she is now traveling around Asia for three weeks, leaving me with only two weeks to spend with her when she gets back.
This is when being an Expat becomes really hard. Our children not only move out of our house, but in most cases, back to their home country, which can be hours by plane away from us.
So many emotions are racing around in my head. I am bereft at my loss, but also excited for her and the adventure she has ahead. I am envious of my sisters who have never left Australia and still have all their children living at home with them. I’m a little excited at the prospect of being able to travel with my husband on business trips, but concerned that I don’t have a clear role in life anymore.
When I contemplated being an empty nester in June last year, I decided I needed a goal to take my mind off my impending loneliness and promptly signed my husband and I up for an ultra marathon in Nepal.
However this time that doesn’t seem to be the answer.
The thought that keeps coming into my head is, “why am I living overseas when all my children are now in Australia?”
When we first moved to Vietnam 8 years ago, it was for 2yrs, with the option to extend for 3 if we liked it. All three girls were with us, and to be honest it never entered my head that I would still be living overseas 8 years later…without my children.
Life is a series of transitions, and I’m about to face my biggest one yet. I haven’t lived without children in my house since I was 23yrs old. I’m not sure I even know how too.
I will need to learn to shop and cook for two people. I will have no one to nag to clean their bedroom and do the dishes. Who will I watch the next season of “The Good wife” with, and when I bake, who will eat the other half of the cake? (Healthy cake of course!). There will be no more unmatched socks in the wash, and my clothes won’t disappear from my wardrobe. Who will I ask when I have computer problems, or need to be instructed for the 10th time how to download movies?
It is a new chapter for both of us. I’m sure there will be some great moments and some tough ones, but if being an Expat prepares us for anything, then it’s change.
Like any new challenge I will take it one day at a time.
“Good parents give their children roots and wings: roots to know where home is, and wings to fly off and practice what has been taught them”.